Why men are attracted to big booty women

Have you ever wondered why men seem to like big booty women? Why, when some men see nyansh, they get reduced to thinking in binaries? At the slightest shake or wiggle, some can give up their birthright and even steal someone else’s own to add to the bargain.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not one of these Neanderthals. I’m not an ass man; I play for the other team, but even… no! No! I’m not gay! I meant I’m a boob man! Why would you think gay is the opposite answer? What is wrong with you? I’m straight as an arrow, and boob is life for me. Take me to the promised land, and there’s surely a 36 DD Amazon waiting for me there, so no, I’m not gay!

Anyways, as I was saying, even though I’m not a fan of big booty, there are instances when I’ll see a curvy shawty and I’ll lose concentration for a second or two. Boob and ass men have been locked in a centuries-old war that has left a lot of casualties and doesn’t seem to be ending anytime soon, so for a team captain like me to be getting distracted by the enemy; I mean, it’s embarrassing. And especially with the popularity of songs like Nicki Minaj’s Anaconda, Meghan Trainor’s All About That Bass, and, of course, Jennifer Lopez and Iggy Azalea’s Booty celebration, bum-bum seems to be having its… well, biggest moment ever.

I mean, look at the recent craze of Bhadie Kelly that almost made several Nigerian ladies hire assassins, either to take out the girl or their senseless boyfriends. It’s not like her booty is even that big, but look how guys were just losing their minds. It’s annoying.

So, naturally, I decided to study this phenomenon more… no, it’s not an excuse to look at more ass. Master Sun Tzu said, “If you know your enemy, you need not fear the outcome of a thousand battles”. I don’t think I’ve ever seen an ass man getting tempted with big breast; it’s always my comrades that are falling by the wayside.

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Why Do Men Like Big Booty Women?

What’s so special about nyansh, and why are my comrades being taken to the other side? Is it some sort of psychological weapon being deployed? Or have I been in the wrong team all this while? Let me sneak into the enemy’s camp to find out.

They Are Sexy and Fine To Look At

Men are visual creatures; they are excited about what they see. It’s that simple. So, if they see a beautiful woman in a swimsuit or sexy tight leggings, they will be instantly attracted to her. Of course, they will check out her smile, her hair, her eyes, and her smile, but all of those are usually secondary to her body type. Personality? Pfft! That one comes later.

So while this might be a cliché, most guys are indeed suckers for an hourglass figure. I should know because I’m also guilty. See what I was saying about psychological warfare? This is like an Arsenal fan who likes Harry Kane or Son Heung-Min; it’s a capital offense. But there is just something about a big booty that sparks a guy’s imagination, and we spend a great amount of time observing that particular part of the female body.

They Are Nice To Feel

Big booty, especially those with the perfect amount of fat in the right places, can serve as a hand warmer, a pillow, or just something fun and soft to play with. There is nothing more beautiful than a perfectly shaped big butt to make a guy lose his mind and there’s nothing more soothing than the feeling of warmth from a nicely shaped booty!

But then, it’s the same for boobs. I’d even argue that they’re softer and… squishier than ass. So, what’s the hype about?

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It Is Genetic

Interesting! According to Gordon Gallup Jr, an evolutionary psychologist at the University of Albany, men being attracted to big booty is woven into their genes. In an interview with MTV News, he said that evolution isn’t always about survival of the fittest; it also involves matching your genes with someone “who has genes that code for health, fertility and vitality.” Ergo, that means all the right junk in the right places.

“The reason narrow waists and broad hips are so prized – the reason males rate these as being attractive, even though they don’t have any insight into why they do – is twofold,” Gallup said. “It means, if a woman has a narrow waist, she’s not pregnant. And if she has broad hips it means that the underlying skeletal morphology is probably such that she’d be able to have a relatively unencumbered childbirth.”

What this means is that an hourglass shape indicates that a woman is single and ready to mingle, or, you know, to easily give birth to healthy children.

And speaking of babies, women with big booty also apparently give birth to smarter kids, and tend to be more intelligent themselves. Gluteofemoral fat, which is fat stored in women’s butts, has unique long-chain polyunsaturated fatty acids that are important for babies’ brain development.

“They’ve done research that shows that as gluteal femoral fat stores go up, so do the cognitive scores of babies born to women with large hips,” Gallup said. “And not only are babies advantaged, but even the mothers are. Mothers with large hips and butts also have a significant advantage on cognitive tests.”

They Are A Sign of Being in Good Shape

The sight of a nice, big, round booty probably means that the woman really cares about her body, because it is allegedly not easy to maintain. I mean, it is one thing for nyansh to be big, but is it standing gidigba? This means that she is definitely working out to make her bottom appealing.

Hence, it is no wonder that guys get turned on by bigger booty; it tells them that the woman is taking care of her body, which equals hitting the gym regularly. And this thought is extremely sexy because it brings with it an image of a woman doing squats, which leads to more sinful thoughts. Men can’t help but drool at the thought of a woman in different sexy positions at the gym.

They Are A Sign of Superior Intuition

And last but not least, scientists also believe that emotional intelligence and booty size are connected, as women develop emotional intelligence at the same time they gain curves in puberty. Hence, they develop superior social skills in order to pick a potential mate, understand things faster and are also more intuitive than their counterparts with flatter butts.

Guess it’s not just your day, small booty women… ouch! Hey! Stop throwing things at me! I’m on your side here! You should be attacking my editor! He made me write this, which means he also probably likes big booty and wants to understand why.

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